Wednesday, August 29, 2007

no wonder the GOP symbol is an elephant...

so the breaking news of a few days ago (we here at afropologe are like the daily show. we don't like to report news RIGHT as it happens. our lateness is what makes us unique.) is that GOP senator Larry Craig pled guilty to charges of disorderly conduct after being accused of "lewd behavior" in a public restroom. translation: he's a huge homo and repressed it so long under his republicanism that his secret gayness resorted to soliciting plainclothes cops in bathroom stalls in its attempt to be free. how awkward. you can read the actual story here on pam's house blend. apparently perez hilton linked to this story and it shut down her whole server for a bit. which i guess just proves that a lot more people care about political scandal when its sandwiched in between britney's mess of a life and rihanna's new boyfriend, shia lebeouf (gasp!).

anyways, two questions:

1- what the hell is going on with the republican party lately? seriously. more republicans are gay these days than hippies. the remaining republicans who haven't been shamed by turning up as secretly gay, black, or female are like, who? george bush and karl rove? thats gonna make for a really awkward national convention. and for those republicans who haven't come out yet (been outed by the po-po or the paparazzi yet), its only a matter of time. i mean come on, ann coulter. you're not ACtually fooling anyone. it does make you wonder, though, how the christian right can even function while drowning in this quagmire of hypocrisy. it would seem to me like every time anyone opened their mouth to speak, a bone would pop out, if not an entire skeleton. its no wonder all those closet doors stay shut.

2- is EVERYONE gay??? answer: apparently. in all seriousness though, i recently read (skimmed, looked at the pictures) a book about all the gayness that goes on in the wild, and it turns out that like, over 50% of elephants are gay. which is interesting considering that elephants and dolphins (also super gay) are some of the smartest animals around. even more interesting: tons of monkeys are gay. suspicious? i think so. if monkeys are supergay, it only stands to reason that so are humans. which means i guess you can't really blame larry craig for being both gay and republican. probability was against him.

laugh now, but when it turns out that 60% of people are gay and we're just such a fucked up society we never even realized it, were all gonna feel pretty stupid.

2 comments:

Seven Star Hand said...

Hello Kaya,

Karma can be a bitch when the time to pay the piper for such staggering hypocrisy rolls around. It just boggles the mind that holier-than-thou Christian leaders are so often involved in sick, sick, behavior. Just look at the history and current events of the Vatican and Papacy. See the patterns here?

Notice that Larry Craig was nabbed on June, 11th? Notice the pattern of pivotal events repeatedly occurring on number 11 days during recent years? How many unlikely coincidences are necessary before one sees a strong pattern in the noise?

Here is Wisdom !!

kidbonita said...

aren't elephants afraid of mice?